Letting go and letting God has been such a struggle for me in my walk of faith. I’ve always been a “in control” kind of person the type who thinks, “If it’s going to get done right, I probably need to do it myself.” I believe in God. I truly do trust that everything is in His control. But even with that belief, I still find myself asking… why is it so hard to fully give it all to Him?

And I don’t think it’s doubt. I think it’s my mindset. Deep down, I’ve learned to believe that I have to be in control of my life and everything that happens in it. But the truth is, God is in control, not me. Not Shelby. God knows what’s happening long before we ever catch on. Nothing in this life slips past Him. Nothing surprises Him. Nothing happens without Him allowing it, guiding it, or working through it in some way we may not understand yet.

Why do we question God when life hurts?

When hard or painful things happen, our first response is often:
“Why would God allow this?” or “Why would He let this happen to me?”

And those questions are real. God can handle them. Yes, God allows things to happen, but He also gave humanity free will. People make choices, good and bad and we live in a broken world where those choices have consequences. Sometimes what we’re walking through isn’t God harming us… it’s life in a fallen world intersecting with human decisions, timing, and spiritual battles we can’t fully see.

To trust God fully, we have to do more than just believe He exists, we have to believe His Word and actually live it out daily.

We have to immerse ourselves in scripture.
We have to learn His character.
And we have to trust Him enough to obey Him even when we don’t understand Him.

Trust means believing that even when we can’t see the reason, there is one. Even when the outcome doesn’t make sense to us, God is still good.

Why is trusting God so hard for us?

Honestly? I think it comes down to being human. We want control. We want to control outcomes so we can feel safe. We want to plan every detail, so nothing surprises us. We want certainty so we don’t get hurt again. A lot of the time, control feels like protection.

We start to believe:

• If I stay in control, I can avoid disappointment
• If I plan everything, I won’t get hurt
• If I manage it all, nothing will fall apart

But the reality is… control is an illusion. And it slowly becomes exhausting. We also struggle to trust because of past pain. We remember what didn’t work out. We remember what broke us. And instead of surrendering, we start gripping tighter because we don’t want to feel that again.

Signs you may be struggling to trust God

Here are a few gentle signs I’ve noticed in myself and maybe you can relate:

1. Overthinking everything
Your mind never really shuts off. You’re always analyzing, planning, replaying, or worrying. “What if” becomes your default thought.

2. Constant worry about the future
Anxiety about what’s coming next, what could go wrong, or what you need to do to prepare for everything.

3. Trying to control outcomes
You find yourself creating scenarios in your head, trying to predict every possible outcome so you can “stay ahead” of life.

4. Difficulty letting go in prayer
You pray about it, but you still hold onto it. You know you should release it, but it feels scary to fully hand it over.

But here’s the truth: God already knows it all. Every fear, every thought, every burden you’re carrying. Nothing is hidden from Him. And He’s not asking you to carry it all. He’s asking you to give it to Him.

Practical Ways to Grow in Trust

Trust isn’t built in one moment it’s built in small, daily choices.

Here are a few things that help me:

1. Daily surrender prayer
Not long or perfect just honest. Something like: “God, I give You what I’m carrying today. Help me trust You with it.”

2. Replace control thoughts with truth
When fear shows up, intentionally replace it with scripture or truth about God’s character.

3. Write it out and release it
I physically write down what I’m anxious about, pray over it, and intentionally let it go.

4. Spend consistent quiet time with God
Not out of obligation, but connection. Even 5–10 minutes matters.

5. Look back at what God has already done
Reminding yourself of past faithfulness builds present trust.

Encouragement for the Woman in the Middle of It

If you’re in the middle of learning how to trust God, I want you to hear this clearly:

You’re not behind.
You’re not failing.
And you’re not alone in this.

Trust is not a personality trait you either have or don’t have it’s something God grows in us over time. Some days you’ll feel strong in your faith. Other days you’ll feel like you’re holding on by a thread. Both are part of the process. God is not frustrated with your journey. He’s patient in it. And even when your grip feels tight, His grip on you never loosens.

How I’m Personally Working on This

Right now, I’m intentionally practicing daily surrender. I’m working on giving God my anxieties, my worries, and the things I try to control in my own strength. Not once, but every day sometimes multiple times a day. I’m spending more quiet time with God, not just talking to Him, but really listening and sitting in His Word. And I’ve been diving into scripture, especially stories that show what it looks like to trust the Lord even when things don’t make sense in the moment.

One of the tools I’m using is a study guide called 100 Days of Believing Bigger. Each day gives a short teaching and reflection questions that really challenge me. for example:

• What am I struggling to give God today?
• Where am I trying to stay in control?
• How can I trust Him in this specific area?

Every day has a different focus, and it’s been helping me slow down and actually practice trust instead of just talking about it. Because for me, this isn’t about getting it perfect. It’s about learning slowly, honestly, and daily to let go and let God. Always remember, consistency over perfection.